Shannon A., Dan B., Fred B., Rusty B., Naaman C., Dion C., Barbara C., Stacy E., Brandi F., Karla H., David Jr K., Brad K., Liz L., Rhoda L., Dennis L., Josh M., Sarah M., Joe P., Kathy P., Cristy R., Nancy S., Autumn S., Greg V., Kay W., Stephanie W.

Congrats!

I got the call from BE Music (James Hodgin and Don Donahue to be exact) on Tuesday morning that we were CONFIRMED to open for Alan Jackson that Saturday! So in the next few days, we had to:

- Get t-shirts rush printed because I was out
- Buy a trailer and trailer locks
- Rent a monitor rig, sound board, snake, walkie talkies
- Find a band to fill in for us on the date we had booked
- Buy a merch display (table, backdrop, mannequins, hangers, cash box, lights, etc)
- Play Gruene Hall and Love & War
- Drive through the night 8 hours to Kansas

What a whirlwind that was!

By the end of the Alan show I had had two hours of sleep in the last 38 hours!

So here’s the report on the gig itself: FABULOUS. It was the highlight of my career so far. There were roughly 4,500 fans in the house, all amped up and ready to have a good time. We did the following 30 minute set:

- The Right Place
- Ride With Me
- I Am What I Am
- Overnight Success
- ’87 Chevy
- 99 Bottles

Long story short, the crowd loved it and we had a blast on stage. I pretended to be an Emcee and introduced myself, I threw out t-shirts to the most energetic fans, and I generally just goofed off and had fun with 4,500 new friends. The band did awesome and rocked the house…very proud of those guys…we’ve only been playing together for 3 weeks and they stepped up to the plate and nailed it.

I didn’t meet Alan, but didn’t expect to based on conversations with other bands that have opened for him. I could have “ambushed” him on his way to and from the stage, but I’ve already shaken his hand at the ASCAP awards a couple years ago, and I chose instead to be out at my merch booth signing autographs and taking pics with fans.

Speaking of which, I couldn’t walk anywhere afterwards without someone shaking my hand, asking for a pic, or handing me something to autograph. I was feelin’ the love! We sold more CDs than I’ve ever sold at one show before, and we made a ton of new fans! All in all, I felt validated, energized, optimistic, and extraordinarily grateful. Big thanks to BE Music and Don Donahue for setting it up, to James Hodgin and Rusty Redden for handling so many details, and to Alan’s crew for being so welcoming and gracious.

Let’s do it again!  Ha

Z

I’m gonna describe my ideal home and lifestyle, and you the fans can keep in touch to see if I ever achieve anything like it (and whether it actually makes me happy or not).

OK… I’m in a medium-sized but very clean, open, homey, and beautiful house. Outside there are rolling hills and large, old trees scattered here and there, plus a pond or creek or two. The house has the look and feel of an old farmhouse, but certain modern advances are discreetly woven in… energy efficiency, recycling, etc. still it features a lot of old-school technology like a wood burning stove, handmade quilts and mugs, restored guns, antique furniture, etc. It’s decorated in sort of a 1950′s/Texas pioneer log cabin style.

It sits on some acreage… maybe 20 acres, maybe 200.  I’ve got some helpers who maintain the property for me when I’m on the road… mending fences, grading roads, brush hogging, etc.  But when I’m home I, get to know every square inch like the back of my hand from tromping around it with family and friends and hunting on it.

While the house is fairly modest in size, say 1500 square feet or so, there is a “game room” building out back, as well as a storage building and the covered parking spot for the tour bus.

The game room has a pool table, a ping pong table, and a little home theater set up (or maybe that’s in the house).  Also, in either the house or an out-building is my office/writer’s room, which has more the feel of an 18th century writer’s office/hunting cabin.

My parents and in-laws live in separate houses on neighboring property, or at least very nearby. The house feels like it’s way out in the country but it’s actually fairly close to town.

All in all, it’s the kind of place where your family can feel rooted… the kind of place you’re proud to pass down through the generations. Next, I could talk about what ideal daily or weekly schedule would be like living on this dream property. But for now, bed is calling!

- Z

First, I printed my boarding pass but left it at home by the printer.

Next, I relaxed and talked with Jodi a bit before leaving, making me 20 minutes later than I should’ve been getting out the door.

Finally, I went to check in at United Airlines gate E6 where the computer did not have my reservation.

Their desk was in turmoil and I wasted 45 minutes just waiting in line to talk to a real human being.  The particular human being I got was a pudgy woman with weary eyes that still managed to flash with annoyance as she informed me dryly that there WAS no United Airlines flight to Salt Lake City.  At which point I took the trouble to double-check the gate number I had written down, and to pull the virtual boarding pass up on my laptop.

I was booked on US AIRWAYS gate E36, not United gate E6!  Which of course meant I was in deep doodoo after parking in the remote lot and spending all that time in the wrong line.  I then had to run.

Of course I opted to bring my laptop on this flight, and because my traveling songwriter guitar has a broken headstock I had to bring my NICE (heavy) guitar in its clunky case.  So off I went, running down the sidewalk with 2 large bags and a guitar.  I huffed and puffed up to gate 36 just in time for the nice lady to inform me that it was TOO LATE to check a bag.  She said this was the last flight out tonight, and since my gig was at 11:30 the next morning I told her I HAD to be on it.

She kindly said she would look the other way and let me go through security despite the 2 bag limit.  I thanked her profusely and ran away again.  In the end, I made it just in time and I was one of the last people on the last plane out.

- Z

I’m brutally tired but very happy after a truly wonderful show in France.  It was like I was a big deal for a night, with a couple hundred people against the stage and a couple hundred more dancing and standing scattered in the background.

They chanted for 2 encores that were planned and then insisted on a third that was unplanned.  But it was awesome and the energy was great.  We ended with “The Cowboy and the Clown”—I broke a string, set my guitar down, and jumped all around the stage.  Went crazy.  Ha.

Bon soir.  Il faut dormir.  (Good night….I need to sleep.)

- Z

Let me see if I can recap it to this point: Sunday, the 25^th we had the Texas Regional Radio Awards show. The next day we packed and ran errands all day until 5:30 PM and finally got on the road. We had to be in Alabama (an 11 hour drive) by 6 PM the following day.

We swung by the post office on our way out of town and Jodi told me she was

PREGNANT!

Woohoo!  I said, if I remember correctly, “Holy crap!” and then teared up. I was excited and thankful and just felt so blessed. So we headed out and got about four hours down the road. I pulled off at about 9:30 and we got a bed at the Baymont Inn & Suites in Longview, TX. We loaded everything in and hit the hay!  Jodi nursed Buck to sleep and we were all in the same bed with him between us.

At 2 AM, I woke to the most awful sound I’d ever heard – a strained, choked, unnatural gasping sound coming from the other side of the bed.

I immediately knew something horrible was happening.  I turned on the lamp on my side of the bed to see Jodi lying on her back with her eyes open but sightless and devoid of expression, hands clenched in tortured fists at her chest, entire body rigid and making small jerking movements.  She was making the sound of someone choking after sucking a large object down their windpipe, and her skin had a strange dark tint to it.  I ran to her, yelled her name, grabbed her hand, looked into her eyes, but saw no sign of a person in there.

I ran to the phone and dialed “0”.  The front desk answered.  Speaking as quickly as I could and trying to control the hoarse panic in my voice, I choked out, “I need an ambulance right away – my wife is having a seizure.”  “What room?” asked the voice, instantly on edge.  I reeled for a second, looking for my key card, and then suddenly remembered “104!”  I hung up, ran back to Jodi.  I stroked her forehead and said “it’s OK, baby.  Hang in there, sweetheart.  Hold on, Jodi.”  I had no idea at that point if she was dying on me or what.

The seizure seemed to be lessening a little by then, but her eyes were still vacant and staring.  Her jaw was irresistibly opening, then clamping down, opening, then clamping down.  There was a sharp knock at the door and I ran to open it.  A young man came in and said, “I work here at the hotel, I’m an EMT”.  He went over to Jodi and looked at her, aghast.  “Ma’am?”, he said.  “Ma’am, can you hear me?”  It was about this time that the seizing stopped and her eyes closed.  “Ma’am, can you squeeze my hand?  What’s her name?” he asked me. “Jodi,” I said. “Jodi, can you hear me?  Squeeze my hand if you can hear me.”

No response.

“Can you open your eyes for me?”

No response.

He stepped back and seemed unsure what to do.  “Uh, OK… OK… she’s breathing…” He checked her pulse.  “She’s got a good pulse.”  While he bent over her I stroked her hair and kissed her forehead, but there was so no response.

I ran to my suitcase, pulled out a pair of jeans and hurriedly pulled them on. I grabbed keys and wallet and stuffed them in my pockets, then slipped on some tennis shoes. “You’re gonna wanna move him,” said the man, pointing to Buck.  “The ambulance team will need him out of the way.”  I thought about Buck for probably the first time since the crisis started…. there he was, beside Jodi in the middle of that big bed, sprawled out on his back and sleeping soundly with his perfect little pink lips slightly parted.

Not wanting to wake him until I absolutely had to, I rushed around the room grabbing anything I thought I should take to the hospital… Jodi’s purse, Buck’s diaper bag, my cell phone charger… suddenly I heard the man saying, “It’s alright, ma’am!  I’m an EMT!  I work here at the hotel!  You’ve had a seizure!”

Jodi was sitting up in bed, staring wild-eyed as in a nightmare, with a crazed look of fear and bewilderment mixed with outrage on her face. She thrashed around a second as I leapt toward the bed saying, “It’s OK, baby!  It’s OK!”  Then she stopped moving, slumped over, and her eyes went vacant again.  I started to think I’d lost her, and that she wasn’t going to recover from this obvious brain damage.

I fought to maintain my composure.  The man suggested I go out in the parking lot and flag down the ambulance.  Maybe he heard them coming up – I don’t know – but I don’t remember their sirens ever being on.  I ran outside and they were pulling into the parking lot.  I urgently waved them over and pointed to the room where our door was spilling out light.  I said to the two men getting out, “My wife’s inside and she’s had a seizure, come quick!”  A third guy got out of the back.  They were wearing dark blue uniforms that I THINK said firefighter somewhere, maybe on one of the iron-on patches.

We all rushed in and Jodi was sitting up in bed, clutching the bed sheets to her chest and looking around wildly.  She was wearing a t-shirt and pajama bottoms.  I said “Baby!  Baby!  It’s OK!  I’m here!” but couldn’t tell by her look if she recognized me or not.  The paramedics said, “Ma’am, you’ve had a seizure.  How are you feeling?  Jodi looked at them, amazed and suspicious, then tried to speak for the first time.

“A seizure?” she said, shaking her head a little in disbelief. Her words slurred as if half her face and tongue were numb.

“Ma’am, do you know where you are?”

“Home?” Jodi mumbled vaguely.

“No, ma’am.  You’re in a hotel.  You’ve just had a seizure and we’re here to help you. Do you know who this is?” (pointing to me.)

“My husband,” she said, as if through a mouthful of peanut butter.

“Do you know what day it is?”  She shook her head.

“Can you tell me your name?”  She pointed to one of the firemen and said, “That’s my name.”  He had “J. Williams” printed in silver stitching over his right shirt pocket.

The fireman didn’t understand this but I explained.  “J. Williams!  Her name is Jodi Williams… she’s saying that’s her name.”

I looked back at Jodi and she was now looking at the roomful of paramedics as if seeing them for the first time, frightened and bewildered again.  “Get away!” she said, and drew the covers up to her neck so only her head was poking out, looking indignant.

“Ma’am, we need to take you to the hospital.”

“No!” Jodi said, “I don’t feel good!  No!” as they tried to pull the covers off her. Then she saw Buck there in the middle of the bed, still lying on his back and breathing deeply, sound asleep.  For a moment she lost all her bewilderment and suspicion and said, “Isn’t he CUTE! Awww, look… isn’t he CUUUUTE?”  The three firemen were standing there unsure of how to deal with this wild-eyed crazy lady.  By now her speech was more normal and the slurring was gone, but she was still acting like someone underwater or in a dream.

“Ma’am, we need to put you on this stretcher,” they said, finally wrestling the covers away from her and putting their hands under her armpits and legs.  “No!” she protested feebly, “No!  Stop it!  I don’t feel good!”

“We know ma’am and we’re gonna take you to the hospital.”

They started fastening a strap over her legs just below the knees and she leaned forward urgently, trying to pull it off.  “No! Stop it.”  I was there in front of her saying, “It’s OK, babe!  It’s OK, just relax!” but it was no use… she kept struggling weakly and protesting as they wheeled her out.  One of the firemen pointed to Buck, still out cold, and said, “I like this little guy. He knows how to SLEEP.  He’s like me, he doesn’t let anything bother him when he’s sleeping.”

It was about then he began to stir, yawn, and then he opened his eyes.  “Hey buddy!” I smiled.  “Hey Punkin!  There’s an ambulance here… you wanna go see the ambulance?”  Buck nodded sleepily and I picked him up and went out to where they were loading Jodi’s stretcher into the back.

I didn’t know if we were riding with her inside the ambulance or what.  I wanted to, because I wanted her to have a familiar face, and for all I knew she might have another episode and die or become unconscious at any time.  But the fireman said, “No… you’ll want your vehicle there.  You can just follow us over.”  So I loaded Buck up, still in his PJs, with whatever I could grab out of the hotel that I thought we might need.

Once Buck was strapped in and ready to go, the ambulance still hadn’t been started and no one was in the front of it so I went around back.  By this time I had called Jodi’s parents and woken them up with the bad news that we were heading to the hospital 3 hours aways from them in Longview, TX.  I looked through the windows of the ambulance…. Jodi was strapped to a gurney, which had her sitting up but reclined a little and she had an EMT on either side.  I could tell right away that she was a lot more with it… maybe even normal.  As I opened the back doors the EMT on the left was getting a needle ready to stick into the top of Jodi’s left hand.  She was protesting saying, “No!  Wait!  It’s too big!  That thing’s HUGE!  Noooooo!”

I went to her and said, “Baby just look right here at me – look in my eyes, Baby.” Then she winced and said, “Ow!”  The other man said, “Just hold still, Ma’am… you don’t want him to have to do this twice.”  I tried to distract her by letting her talk to her parents on the phone….they were pretty freaked out obviously and I wanted them to at least hear her voice. She didn’t say much… just “hello” and “I love you.” They said they loved her, were praying for her, were on their way, and to hang in there.  Then it was over, and the ambulance was ready to leave.  I jumped into the car and followed them on the 10 minute drive to the hospital.  They drove kinda fast, but never put on the lights or sirens.  The streets were mainly deserted.

By the time they wheeled her into the ER, she was acting pretty much normal.  But she was surprised when one of the nurses or EMT mentioned her being pregnant. She said, “Wait… what?  Did you say I’m pregnant?”  And I said “Yeah, Baby…. Remember you told me in the post office parking lot before we left?  She was like “Oooooh, yeah.  Wow….”

Before long, they wheeled her off to do a CAT scan.  They also took blood and a urine sample while I took Buck on a quick tour of the lobby.  After a while a nice young doc came to say that the CAT scan and blood analysis were normal, which ruled out stroke and large brain tumor.  He said they might do an MRI later, and that seizure meds had the potential to harm the baby, so we might have to make a difficult decision at some point.

Jodi’s parents showed up at 5 AM and… well y’all, I’m running out of gas on telling the story.  It was a long 2 days and one night in the hospital, but we survived and so far Jodi has felt normal but tired.

The docs say she has a 50/50 chance of having another seizure at some point, according to statistics.  The risk factors that increase likelihood are sleep deprivation, low blood sugar, stress, dehydration, illness, etc.  We’re doing our best to avoid all these and I personally am just praying every night before I go to bed that I don’t wake up again to that horrible sound of tortured, gasping breathing with my best friend and lover unconscious and convulsing next to me.

- Z

When I shared that first gig with Jon Christopher it was just to get my foot in the door because I had few (if any) local fans. Or even further back, when I used to play in Nashville at Christopher Pizza Company….that place seated about 20 people and I NEVER filled it up. Ha.

But that’s the deal… I feel so much more special and respected and appreciated here in Texas than ever did in Nashville. It’s just a culture thing. Texans may talk during your songs, but they’ll also support you fiercely for decades.  Ha.

- Z

Ray Wylie Hubbard is 66, the Bellamy brothers are 62 and 66.  Gary P. Nunn and Michael Martin Murphy are both 67.  That means all of those guys have been doing this basically three times as long as I have.  In the last six months I have seen all of those acts play live, for healthy crowds, and kill it.

I look at my current catalog of songs, and try to imagine what kind of show I could put on if I had two or three times as many.  If you took my best 12 tunes and gave me another 12 or 24 that were just as good or better, I could put on one he!! of a 90 minute show!  But all of those older acts I’ve mentioned have FAMOUS songs…songs that people have been hearing and enjoying for years.  And THAT’s what I need to be doing right NOW while I’m young—making the great songs I’ve already written famous, so that people will still come to see me when I’m 68.

Guy Clark, who I’m excited to open for this May, is 71.  If people still listen to live music 40 years from now, and still appreciate great songs, I could be on his level if I just keep it up.

And that’s exactly what I intend to do.

It’s time to talk a little about goals and hopes and maybe even a few silly predictions for the year. My main focus for this year is already set… it is GO TIME!

I’ve thought a lot about it, and I feel very strongly that now is the time for me to make a big career push. I’m in kind of a sweet spot between youth and energy on one hand, and experience and connections on the other. Plus now I’ve got a team and more financial help than ever.

Right now, I’m looking at 1999 to 2011 as the “getting oriented” phase of my career and I think in a lot of ways the REAL ARTIST CAREER phase begins now. To make that push, and to keep my family happy, are really the only two goals I have this year. More specifically, I want to do anything and everything BE Music finds for me to do, plus add my own opportunities whenever possible, all while maintaining healthy habits with regard to time with family, diet and exercise, and writing songs and practicing the guitar.

Career-wise, I have two main goals for this year: come out with a new album that is my best ever, and do whatever it takes to be playing every weekend with a full band. If I do those things my fan base WILL grow.

I also want to build on and improve my already existing habits of working out, practicing guitar, watching Buck, cleaning the kitchen, listening to audiobooks, etc.

So how about some predictions?

• I predict we will at least get pregnant… maybe even have a new baby this year! How exciting would THAT be!

• I predict I will do at least some recording with Frank Liddell

• I predict everything will take longer, be harder, and cost more than we thought it would. (That’s pretty standard)

• I predict my parents will move here, and I’ll sure be glad!

• I predict I won’t really start touring heavily with the band until summer or even fall.

• I predict I will have a BLAST with Buck this year!

I’m just imagining a new van, some new band members, a new album, my parents moving here, a new pregnancy, Buck getting weened and potty-trained, a trip to France, a whole lot of new fans, some new songs, a new website, maybe my first music video…. Man, do we have a lot to look forward to this year or WHAT?

Let’s get on with it! Yeehaw baby!

- Z